Chapter 9

Everyday I learn something about myself. Today I've learned how much determination is inside me.

Me waiting to leave my side hustle to interview for a real gig. I wanted to hurt everyone in that office.

A couple of days ago I realized just how much I sacrificed to get into a better position. I dropped people, lazy mornings, junk food and new potential dates in order for something better. I didn't speak with my family or close friends as much as I usually did because I wanted to have something new to tell them. Their daughter and friend isn't dealing with this particular combination of struggle anymore.

I also didn't want them to worry. I know they do. The least I could do since I'm away from them is succeed. If you can guess or follow me on Twitter, you can figure out that I found a full time job. Don't let the lack of exclamation points fool you. I'm overjoyed! But man this was hard! I went without so much just to survive on so little. And now my hard work has paid off.

As for my guilt I mentioned last time, it's more or less subsided. The people I dropped, the one guy in particular, weren't meant to last. That's why it was so easy to let them go. The guilt was there because...well...I'm prone to feel guilty. My spirit doesn't do well with it.

Now my next task is organizing my life. That means using those notebooks I'm damn near collecting. It'll help me get consistent with this content schedule I have for this here site. Yes, I have a schedule. I just have a hard time adhering to it. Don't judge me. If it all works out, I'll fill you in on my next chapter in 2 weeks.